Relationship vlogger, Kesena Opeyemi, has stated that people who go into marriage with the mindset that their partner will meet them halfway are in for a rude shock.
She said this through her Twitter citing her marriage as a case study and how her expectations turned out unrealistic.
She wrote, “Before I got married I used to think that marriage was 50/50. That is I would do my 50% and my husband would do him and meet me halfway. Being married has made me realize how flawed this ideology is. It may sound logical but couples who use it are destined for disappointment.
I love cooking and my younger sister loves washing plates. As a single girl while I lived with my parents I would cook most of the meals and my sister would wash all the plates. Somewhere in my head, I figured that when I got married I would just be cooking and my husband would wash all the plates. Unconsciously I had created a 50/50 plan. So when I got married, I would cook and expect my husband to wash the plates.”
“When I washed them, I didn’t do it happily and when he cooked I wouldn’t want to wash the plates because I don’t like washing plates. I realized I was being selfish.
The greatest flaw of the 50/50 plan is that “it is impossible to determine if your partner has met you halfway”.
Because neither of you can agree on where “halfway” is. The 50/50 plan is selfish and selfishness kills every marriage because marriage is a place to love wholeheartedly. The only plan that works in marriage is the 100/100 plan where both partners are totally committed to loving and serving each other 100%.
You give your partner 100% regardless of what they do and they do the same. I am now open to cooking and washing plates happily and my husband does the same.”
